ZENtheRapper

On June 21st, 2021, I released an album called “Sun God.” I was trepidatious about giving it this name in light of my experiences of receiving a Bipolar Disorder diagnosis, with strains of schizophrenia and grandiosity; an event which threatened my ability to freely express myself. I was told that my most exciting and expansive creative ideas… were maladaptive… indicative of deteriorating or non-sociable mental health.

So when I released it, I wrote up a little caveat that I published to my Instagram story. The caveat was basically me explaining that I was not trying to claim that I was “THE SUN GOD,” in some bombastic, boastful, self-centered, non-palatable kind of way. I explained that I was making art as inspiration from my studies of deep history, studies that revealed a certain structure in humanity, a certain tendency to gaze up toward the sun and revere it as God. A tendency that, even though denounced by contemporary Christians, actually serves to explain the advent of Christianity itself.

I remember several times in therapy after the multiple hospitalizations, the licensed therapist would ask me this barometer type of question: “Do you still want ‘To Save The World.’”

You see, that was a big part of the problem that caused people to think I was severely mentally unwell. I had lots of excitement, lots of passion, and a deep knowledge of language that I thought afforded me the license to use it in creative ways, in allusionary ways when I spoke.

I was “going to make an album to save the world.” And that was Bipolar – Grandiose.

To me, that’s a dope allusion to Avatar the Last Airbender… but I guess she hadn’t seen it; I guess she lacked that cultural knowledge.

I never really got the benefit of the doubt from anyone during that time. I was either severely unwell, or politically dangerous. I wasn’t allowed to just be a dope, generational artist.

Well.

I’m less bashful these days you could say.

I’m less guarded about presenting myself in a palatable way.

I’m sorry to break it to my therapist… but that is still how I feel. I want to make art that is so inspirational, so well-done, that it can have a soteriological effect on the world around me. More so, and in different ways, than a strictly political program could hope to achieve.

So, I want to get into what it meant, what it means to release an album called “Sun God.”

As a Hip-Hop artist I’m drawing ambitious parallels. My other-worldly imagination has sprouted and blossomed, no doubt in response to a lifetime of confused trauma and thoroughly executed alienation.

These are the main parallels I am trying to draw between me, ZENtheRapper, and the concept, the historical idea of the Sun God, as it manifested itself several times throughout the History of Religion and the History of Consciousness.

Siddhartha Gautama – The Enlightened One

I have studied religions tirelessly since graduating from College. I grew up in a Baptist Church and a Catholic School, and had a personal relationship with God through most of my childhood. I was kind of a goody-two shoes and being in Church so frequently, I was a “religious boy” something like the main character in Life of Pi by Yann Martel, obsessed with understanding God and discovering him for myself.

I was plagued with misgivings through my childhood, and learning about institutional racism and the role that Christian actors have played in it through history in College, it seemed a worthy challenge to investigate other religions and study the historical origins of Christianity. So I did. Taking the name ZEN was partly reflective of this desire and planned course of action.

Well in Buddhism, there is this idea that “The Buddha,” or “The Enlightened One,” comes to Earth periodically throughout the history of the universe (think millions and billions of years, not thousands). He has a message of liberation and understanding for all people, appropriate for the time and place he incarnates into.

This idea of (1) cyclical time, and (2) a cyclical divine prophet resonated with me as I went on to study Hinduism, Islam, Zoroastrianism, and Christianity. I noticed that many world religions evolved from a “Sun God Religion” several times over the course of history, across the globe.

So one of the Big Ideas of the Sun God album was deconstructing the world, the religion I was born in to, in favor of larger, more universal understandings of time, of history, and ultimately, of myself.

That’s the historical basis of The Idea.

Then comes the artistic-philosophical-symbolic basis. Even if you have no clue that, for instance, Christianity evolved as a Semitic cult of the warrior god ‘Yahweh’, one particular warrior god amongst a pantheon, and the monotheistic urge arguably comes from Egyptian influence, when Amun-Ra consolidated historical deities into one Sun God as the focus of worship and veneration. Even if you don’t know about those historical eddies, every day when we wake up on Earth, we are greeted by Mr. Sun.

The Sun shines bright. It shines tirelessly. It provides food for plants to grow, which in turn nourishes us. It illuminates the world on an expected schedule, from its place in the distant sky. And more than that just our world too. It shines light at a radius that influences a whole system of worlds, planets, and space.

I was trying to capture this essence of being bright, of being mystical, and being very much willing, almost obligated, to share my light in a non-discriminatory way. Like Jesus would. Like Siddhartha did.

There’s more to it, but this is getting a bit long now. Ultimately, I wanted to profess my rap brand as being one that is super-conscious, but still, somehow, very positive. It’s hard to be positive and conscious as a black man in America, especially one who has had the kinds of psychiatric experiences I’ve endured. But it is a worthy challenge. That’s a big theme in my art: tackling worthy challenges. Listen to Sun God by ZENtheRapper wherever you already consume music.

Thanks For Reading.